Get great ideas from those who have successfully used Barbara's techniques
Here are a few examples of stories written by women (and even a few men!) who have read Barbara's books, and in some cases, also taken her Overcoming Underearning® Seminars. They share exactly how they pulled themselves out of money quagmires and made crucial adjustments to their lifestyles. In short, how they got smart about money. If you find these stories inspiring, there are many, many more in the archives. To access them, simply join the Inner Circle Club here. It's fast, easy and free!
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Cindy Moves Past Her Money Fears
Nothing thrills me more than when I get a follow-up from someone who's attended one of my workshops. Here's a note from Cindy in New York. Her energy and commitment just jumps off the page!
...it's been more than a year since I met you at the Learning Annex in NYC for your one day seminar promoting "Overcoming Underearning."
Well, Barbara, I just wanted to give you a little follow thank you and let you know how much you impacted my life. In no particular order, here are the things that have helped me move past my money fears and grow:
Currently, I work for a contract sales pharmaceutical company which has a lower base salary then what I had been making with the old company, but due to my bonuses, I made almost $90,000 last year. An almost $25,000 increase from the year before.
I did make a commitment to go back into acting. Had new professional headshots taken, got an agent and have been auditioning all year long for a lot of great commercials. Haven't booked any gigs yet, but still trying and excited to feel "creative" again.
I "invoke" your full name whenever I see myself or my best friend Gail, do something that is self-defeating, nonproductive or feels like a devaluing situation that unempowers the financial situation. Sometimes, when I "play" you to my friend Gail, I am better able to see for myself what the financial lesson to be learned is. Gail loves it to, as I'm able to help her out of her stuck places too. Especially when it comes to the first of the month and she's fallen behind on putting out billable hours to bring in her income!
Lastly, and most proudly, at the beginning of this January, I took over the duties of managing and reconciling my own checking account. My mom, who is a retired bookkeeper, has been balancing my checkbook since I first got one at the age of 21. I turned 45 last July. I set the goal of being able to do this for myself and well; I just balanced my third month's bank statement in a row. I know that this is a big step for me.
So, I just wanted to send you a thank you. I can't wait to write you next year and tell you of the $1,000,000 that I just made!
Best regards,
Cindy in New York
Ann's Life Transition
For about the past three to four years, I've been going through quite a major life transition. I was living in a place I was no longer feeling happy in, working in a soul-stifling job, and feeling lots of inner turmoil about my situation as I worked to make changes. As you might have guessed, big changes were on the horizon!
Here's what happened: My workplace was becoming incredibly toxic and it became clear that the healthiest thing for me to do was to leave and pursue an intuition that kept telling me to move to California. I'd done some investigating and found a lot of support for this plan, on many levels.
I've been living in the San Francisco Bay Area since last August and a major component of my life change has involved significantly changing my beliefs and attitudes towards money. I first read Overcoming Underearning two years ago and have been steadily applying the principles throughout my change. Secrets of Six Figure Women has been inspiring my plan to launch my own feng shui consulting practice.
I had been in a major financial fog in my last job, which paid decently, but I wasn't able to save very much because I was spending so much on bodywork, workshops and all kinds of things to make up for how unhappy I was in a job in which I was not appreciated and just didn't like.
I feel a lot smarter in many ways since first encountering your work. I now put myself first. I've stopped giving myself away like I always used to. I downsized considerably and now live in a small studio apartment and enjoy the simplicity of it. I've gotten a handle on my debt situation and stay conscious about money much more of the time.
One major way I feel smarter is knowing that being aligned with my true purpose and living in a place that feeds my soul actually contributes to my financial state considerably. I still have a lot of work to do, but I already have shifted in significant ways internally. I've been focusing on prosperity affirmations and rewriting limiting beliefs about money while becoming conscious of the emotional issues that had me constantly underearning. And I'm in the process of setting up my feng shui business. I have set my intention of earning $150 an hour.
I've come a long way in terms of my relationship with money during a very tumultuous time. Thank you for your guidance through your writings.
~ Ann
Feel the Fear
"I just HAD to tell you that using your recommendations in Secrets of Six Figure Women, today I negotiated a consulting agreement for a whopping 33% more than my old fee. I asked for $100/hour, which frightened me...and my clients are paying it!"
"I 'exorcised' a lot of the spooks I had around money. Those beliefs that we're raised with that get garbled because we're children when we first hear them.
I also got that I should be getting paid what I'm worth. And, of course I'm worth a lot!! This was like a smack on the side of my head! So, I just asked for what I was worth ($100 an hour!).
Like Barbara writes about with understanding our value—knowing we can do things—and yet we balk at requiring payment for that certainty. It's like a ballplayer who bats them out of the park during practice, but in the real game...flinches and strikes out. It's weird, but I've been through it so many times...and this time, even though I was shaking during the negotiations, and frantically emailing my girlfriends, I took another bit of Barbara's advice...I felt the fear, and hung in there anyway, and it was a home run. It was a tremendous shock to my system and I promptly caught a cold that evening, but...now I will have the money to get health insurance, and whatever else I need."
~ Laura Dawson
Words from the Wise
The (Overcoming Underearning®) seminar created a paradigm shift for me, not only in the area of money, but in every single other area of my life. I let go of being free of having to know it all before launching my business, having to do it all by myself, hanging onto regrets about what I have not done up to that point in my life, being afraid to take risks, re-evaluating relationships—primarily friendships—that are not empowering...your words resonated into absolutely EVERY area of my life which was so surprising and wonderful. I had no idea how profoundly our attitude about money reflects our attitude about life and self. I literally got all that from your seminar and my attitude changed so quickly that, honestly, it shocks even me.
My daily actions are now very conscious choices (choices, not decisions—big difference as you know), and I am happy with them. I have committed to taking a risk each day—yesterday's risk was actually having a conversation with you!—and relish the power that I am gaining from that. You were so generous with your listening, support and advice. What a gift, thank you!
I have also committed to doing at least one thing every day towards learning about money and finances, and am enjoying it! Who knew?!! I guess it's because I have taken the pressure off of myself to have to know everything now and now enjoy the process of learning in and of itself. Big attitude change for me.
I spoke with my husband a lot about your workshop and we did some exercises together, which were very enlightening and revealing, we have a great relationship, but your book—Overcoming Underearning®—and the seminar beg answers to questions that couples may not naturally ask of one another, no matter how good their relationship is.
I hope to share your wisdom with current and future Illumin clients. I have already mentioned your workshop and book to most of them. It is so powerful for both men and women that I feel everyone could benefit.
Thank you again for your time and guidance. It has been years since I have felt so inspired and empowered.
I love to share the "How-I-did-it" stories from other women. Sure, they're inspirational. But more importantly, they are powerful, real-life examples of success from which we can model our own plans. Here's a knock-your-socks-off role model: I think the numbers speak for themselves. ~ Barbara
Summer 2003—I did an internship for $9.50/hr. This was a year after I had my son, who is now 4, and I decided I hated being at home. My husband and I role reversed (he loves being a stay-at-home dad). From this point on, I have been the sole breadwinner for our family.
Fall/Winter 2003—I worked part-time for $11/hr. while finishing school
Dec 2003 to Dec 2005—I joined another company full-time after graduating with a BA in English and started at $32,000. I received raises every 6 months to $40,000, $46,000, and finally $52,000. I left for personal reasons. I was offered $75,000 - 85,000 to stay on but I declined. It was not a good environment for me and I wasn't progressing professionally.
May - August 2006—After a personal break, I took a contract job for $32/hr. ($66,000/yr.) Again, turned out to not be a good environment; I read your book during this time and decided then and there that I was going to do what was right for me, quit, and find something I enjoyed and that paid better. I declared to myself my intention of making six figures within one-year right there in the lunchroom. Well...I quit that job a few weeks ago and I've been job-hunting ever since. I thought $32/hr. was a lot, but then I started setting my sights higher, just to see if anyone would bite.
Every recruiter I talked to was shocked when I said, "I want $40/hr." Most of the positions I was applying for were only paying between $20 and $30/hr. The recruiters would try to talk me out of asking for that much, saying "you'll price yourself out of the market" and "I don't think they'll pay that much" to which I responded "fine, they can hire someone else then" (I said this very tactfully of course; not arrogantly).
There have been several times during this 3-week process that I thought, "Maybe they're right. Maybe I am asking for too much. I'll never get a job." But, with my husband's help, I stuck to my guns.
I am currently in the interview process for three jobs, all of which said they are willing to pay me $36 - $40/hr. (even though the max they posted for the jobs was $30/hr.)
Well, I just got an actual offer for $40/hr from one of these companies who want me to start immediately. When I told the recruiter that I was still considering two other jobs, she checked back with the hiring manager and he said he is willing to pay me $43.50/hr.—that's $90,500/yr.! I wasn't trying to get a higher rate, but it happened that way.
Now I am only $10K away from my goal—within SIX WEEKS of reading your book. I've made a jump from $66K/yr. to $90K/yr. in less than 3 weeks!
I'm still not sure which job I'll take, but now I have something to negotiate with. I'm literally in shock, but guess what? I'm not feeling my usual feelings of undeservedness because now I know I'm worth it, damn it!
Steve: From a man's perspective
I may not be your typical reader - if there is one. As a young person I was actually fairly successful and had good money habits - both outer and inner by your standards. In many of the reflection exercises I found myself referring much less to childhood, and more to early adulthood. I had actually been fairly entrepreneurial as a high school student. As a college student and first couple years out of college, I was actually looked up to for my ability to be a leader financially in spite of a pretty humble background - At 22 I had savings, investment, and paid for college - all done without the help of my parents. A couple of failures in my and mid and late 20's started me off track (not excuses but analysis from your reflection exercises and something I did not realize before reading the book). I had been sinking deeper into the doldrums since that time. Of the underearning traits beginning on P. 31, I was / am the poster child for each and every one. Of the self esteem traits on p. 54 - you said checking two was serious - I checked all but one!
Before I read your book, I had been through everything else I could find, trying to get a handle on this area - Suze Orman, Robert Kyosaki, Dave Ramsey, Ron Blue, Larry Burkett, etc. Good stuff all, but at the end of the day - I was still batting low averages - a couple of successful businesses, couple of failures - currently I am getting out of six figure unsecured debt for the second time in my life - finances have always been the thorn in the side of my personal life, marriage and family.
When I have decided I wanted to earn money, I usually could make a plan and pull it off. At age 40, through a series of circumstances I had decided that the best way for me to work is an independent contractor (not as an employee, but also not as an employer - I had tried them both - for small, large, and my own companies), so I had relocated my family to Florida from Indiana to build a business as an independent sales rep. But living on commission, writing and consulting fees (still a decision I am overjoyed with and will continue going forward) began to expose every Underearning trait imaginable in my life - even though I did not yet know them as such. I began to sincerely ask God to help me get to the bottom of this. I knew there was more going on here than simply needing a new spreadsheet, because I just couldn't get my arms around it.
My wife always had told me I was better at earning money for others than for myself - i.e. I did not value myself, my efforts or the money - and she was right - any deal I was involved in always did better for others than for me. It was actually when she came across an article about Underearning on the MSNBC web site which referred to your book, that she forwarded it to me - almost a year ago. She said this looked like something I "would be interested in reading." That same day I proceeded to read all I could on the Internet about Underearning - I had never read anything which seemed to hone in so exactly on the things that were problems for me. When I came across your book - of course I did not have enough money in my checking account to buy it - I went to Borders and read it from cover to cover in one Sunday afternoon.
Still with low cash flow - I then checked it out of the library and went through all of the exercises, etc. in about a 9 week period. That was all in January - March of this year - 2006. I am now just wrapping up my third time through the book - which I have done slowly, over a period of months (and with my own copy!), taking time to reflect, digesting all of the material and starting the foundation for progressive life change as I go through each section. The coincidences, the achieved goals, the successes are starting to stack up, and the piles and the fog are starting to disappear - they are not gone yet. Even though it seems like it an enormous ship to turn around, I am committed to moving forward a little each day - and everything is slowly becoming a different reality for me. Even the life of my family (5 kids) is improving and we are teaching this stuff to our kids as fast as we are learning it ourselves. (I have always been the sole breadwinner in the family - an agreement my wife and I made early in our marriage. We both had teaching degrees but she never taught and I did only briefly before getting involved in business. She is now in nursing school and will be finished in another 18 months - an ambition she has had since her youth - so she will join the earning ranks in the near future.)
RESULTS THEN - FYI - In January when I met you, I was earning about 6K per month (a nice income in Indiana, but not nearly enough to support our family of 7 with the rising cost of living in Florida) and was very scattered. My stated income goal on your page 93 was to be earning at the 12K per month level by year end. I am happy to report that I will achieve that in November - I may even hit 14K for Nov, if I can get some commissions paid out at the right time. I have already doubled last year's sales, and will step over the 100K mark for the year in November. And I already have income in the hopper for December and January. My new stated goals are 175K in 2007, 250K in 2008- ambitious and achievable. (In 2008 I also plan to join the ranks of self published authors - so we'll see where that goes - not writing about money though. I currently write for trade publications)
I have also begun a new habit (among many) - I spend two full afternoons per week working on nothing but financial stuff - past (still digging out of the piles), present and future, including management, administration, forecasting, working with creditors, etc. In the past I would have thought this to be valuable time taken away from producing writing, sales, etc. The truth is it allows me to work better in the time I work - and ultimately causes me produce more in less time - probably a trait of a high earner...go figure. I am working less hours - rarely 50 per week including the financial management time - and with less effort than I ever have before.
Probably the biggest thing in all of this - is that I have begun to value myself in ways I have not since my youth. And I see where I have allowed others not to value me - including my wife and kids. The other big thing is fear. I had no idea how much I had been controlled by it. This whole process is doing many more things in my/our life than just changing what I earn. As Earl Nightengale says - "money is the yardstick." I still have a lot more work to do and further to go, but the possibilities are exciting. While I have availed myself to many more activities and a few more resources during this time, your book has been the primary catalyst for my change. No one else wrapped up my needs in a package and laid them on the table like you did. Even though I was already determined to somehow move forward, if I had not received it I might still be floundering. I am excited about keeping the momentum going for years to come.
"Act small, think big" is my new way of life.
These are just a few of the success stories you can find in our archives. To access those and many other great resources, join the Inner Circle Club today. It's free and it's quick.
My dream is that, inspired by the candor and personal intimacy of these stories, we will begin to seek out other women, frankly discuss our financial affairs, combine our resources, knowledge, and creativity, and give one another emotional as well as practical support. It is by talking openly among ourselves that we as women make our impact on the world.
...it's been more than a year since I met you at the Learning Annex in NYC for your one day seminar promoting "Overcoming Underearning."
Well, Barbara, I just wanted to give you a little follow thank you and let you know how much you impacted my life. In no particular order, here are the things that have helped me move past my money fears and grow: